"Afternoon tea was booked at this hotel as a birthday gift by a friend. I had driven over 100 miles on the hottest day of the year and had skipped breakfast and lunch in anticipation of a lavish afternoon tea at 2pm. What a complete...let down. And a total rip-off. We arrived on time although the parking situation presented a challenge so we checked in five minutes late. We were shown to our table and asked if we wanted drinks. Er, no, we’ve come for afternoon tea so that’s what we will have please. He left us with menus but never came back. After twenty minutes of sitting in a stifling hot and airless dining/tea room where staff were milling about but not paying attention to the handful of guests, my friend donned her face mask and got out of her chair to go across the room and approach one of them to ask for us to be served. The waiter then came over and took our order asking if we had any dietary requirements. My friend had already provided these on the reservation but no matter, we stated them again. She’s vegetarian and I don’t eat red meat. Noted down by the waiter. The tea pots arrive…beautiful but impractical silver that is heavy, red hot and awkward to lift and pour without burning your fingers. Bizarrely, my choice of the usually light and refreshing Earl Grey tea was dark and stewed, metallic and tannin tasting. Quite revolting. On to the food, eventually a small two-tier cake stand was delivered to our table dressed with a selection of miniature scones (the smallest pot of cream and jam between us both that you could ever imagine), two lemon possets and some bite-sized sweet treats. On the bottom level were just four tiny finger sandwiches at each end; meagre and unimaginative fillings for those who don’t eat meat, and nowhere near enough food for my all-day nurtured appetite. But they were fresh at least. There was also a slice of pie and for my veggie friend a light cracker thing with wasabi paste on it. I asked if the pie slice was pork. The waitress said yes. After some discussion with her about our dietary requirements she said “shall I take it away then?”. By this time I’m seriously feeling the irritation. I’m hungry, thirsty and hot, and this is almost a bad joke. If it hadn’t been for the fact that my friend booked this tea and I was embarrassed at the impact it was having on me, I would have simply stood up and walked out. The cake stand was taken away and returned with the pork pie removed and another cracker thing in its place. By this time it was almost 40 minutes after our arrival and this was our lot…for an eye-watering £30 each (plus a cheeky service charge added). I was outraged at their audacity to charge that much money for such slim offerings, vile stewed tea and appalling service. I mentioned to a waiter about the lack of savoury options and my horrid pot of tea and asked for it to be changed; he suggested English Breakfast tea. That came and was just as bad; like builders’ tea that you could stand your spoon up in. I was so fed up and in fear of completely blowing a fuse I went outside for five minutes to calm down. When I came back in I had composed myself and decided to accept things as they were rather than make any more fuss as it was ruining the whole afternoon and unfair on my friend. On my way in I politely asked the waiter for a simple tea bag and hot water. He reluctantly obliged saying they are not actually allowed to serve tea bags. I said I didn’t mind and that was what I wanted. A bog standard tea bag in a teapot of hot water and a fresh cup and saucer arrived. Bliss, at last, a refreshing drink. How the hell can they get brewing tea so wrong? I suspect it was pre-prepared and standing in tea urns but they insisted it was fresh. To be fair to the waiter who dealt with my complaining he was patient and kind, seeing how upset I was and did his best to placate me, bringing a small savoury something extra. It wasn’t his fault that the kitchen were delivering this pitiful tea and I would like to say thank you to him for diffusing my bad mood; your excellent customer service skills are wasted in this hotel. I’m going to The Ritz in London for tea in a few weeks’ time which although is £55 each, I know I’m guaranteed a wonderful afternoon in an ambient setting, with impeccable and attentive service, a decent cup of Earl Grey, my dietary requirements met and as many sandwiches as I would like to eat."
